姓名：谢同学
学校：上海交通大学
分数：90
Toppingthelistisanoldsayingthatgoes:wherethereisawill,thereisaway,whichmeanswearecapableofdealingwiththeenormousobstaclesonthewaytosuccessandovercomingthemultimatelywithstrongdetermination.Asamatteroffact,greatsuccesscanberarelyachievedwithoutthewill.Wehaveallheardaboutthesplendidstoriesofthefamous,evenenvytheirluck.Bycontrast,insteadofbecomingfamousovernight,theyhavegoneviaaroughperiodwithastrongwillandneverabstainfromit.Thesameisaccurateinallwalksoflife.Asforusstudents,indulginginattainingmoreknowledgeandimprovingourabilitysoastohandlecomplicatedproblemsisofsignificantbenefittolaythesolidfoundationoffuturesuccess.Onlyinthiswaycanwebecomeusefultalents.Inanutshell,strongwillisacrucialfactorofourpursuingthesuccess.Bestronglydeterminedandyourlifewillbepolishup.
【评语】
Thewritingfeaturesclearandconciseexpressions.Thecoherenceiseffectivelyachievedthroughtheuseoftransitions.
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